Moving on. An action that can mean so many different things to so many different people. From the literal sense of continued movement on ones path, to the more connotative meaning of letting something go and heading on without looking back. Of course, as a writer of my own thoughts and opinions, I am using it in the sense of moving on with my life without stressing over the actions of others.
Recently, I have been able to speak to my friends about personal matters. It feels amazing getting input back from people who you care for, even if you dont show how much they mean to you. I have honestly never cared about people the way I have recently. Not only because I am beginning to form new intimate relationships, but because I have recently learned I havent done my best when it comes to understanding how people feel about my actions. This brings me to todays piece. Honesty.
I have always thought people would be able to be honest with me. From my family to my friends, I have always tried my best to express myself, and I have clearly been slacking in the personal section of my life. With tensions rising in my family, to tensions rising in new blossoming friendships. My motto has always been to keep your head up and see the best in people, and entering college, I can tell that my opinions of people have changed dramatically. For the worst.
Throughout high school I was able to connect with people with ease, and once I graduated and headed into college, my interactions with strong opinionated individuals shifted to those trying to fit in with people completely different then their normal cliques. This bothered me enough to step back from creating new bonds and experiences and become less social and rethink the people I had met. I needed someone to challenge me as an individual, and only when I met independent minds was I able to rethink what I was looking for not only for myself but for my friendships.
Being completely open could be difficult for some people, I understand that completely. But once a bond is formed, I dont believe anyone should feel the need to hold back. Ive always thought honesty was the best policy for a friendship, but I know that it isnt the best thing for every person. I have been attacked by friends who I thought cared for me as much as I had cared for them, and these pety little arguments break the bonds I took so long to build. In my book, once I let you stay over my house and say what you wanted to say, we were close friends. Once I am able to understand you are having issues and try my best as a person to help you, I believe you should be able to voice your feelings out to the fullest.
Honesty. Being able to talk to people you care for, and maybe even those who dont. Like all good things, honesty has a flip side. The method in which it is presented has a long lasting affect on a relationship. Being able to express your feelings and ideas while respecting the other persons feelings is the best way to go across the situation. It is also important to wait until youre sure enough about what you want to say and how you want the relationship to be like at the end of the conversation. Most people who feel that theyre unheard and unloved express themselves violently and cause problems for not only the person theyre attacking, but for themselves. Not being able to move on without a clear resolution can have a long lasting effect on future relationships.
As for my own experience with honesty, I have learned it is a two way street with both parties looking to better their relationship. I write this to not only express my feelings about honesty, but to let go of what is holding me back from becoming not only a better friend, but a better companion. With the help of R. Brault I will do as any wise person would do and understand that, "Life becomes easier when you learn to accept the apology you never got."
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